If you’re planning on getting married, this section is a good place to start.
You’ll find all you need to get you started, so grab a pen, paper and cup of coffee begin your journey.
Congratulations on your engagement. You are about to experience one of the happiest and most exciting times of your life. You are also about to discover what a huge job planning a wedding can be. We are delighted to be able to offer you a wealth of information gathered from countless weddings and years of experience. Just follow our step by step guide and read the tips and we can promise you a memorable and stress free day.
Write down on a piece of paper a “big picture” overview of your wedding. Ask yourselves “what is important to you” about your wedding. It could be music, food, wine, having lots of people or just a few, family, children. From these note write a mission statement about your wedding.
Then rate your wishes in order of priority, one being the most important down to the least.
Keep this mission statement and order of priorities in a your wedding folder and refer back to it whenever you make a decision about your wedding.
Check for other things that may affect your date. (sports, festivals, concerts etc)
Other events on in the region can effect accommodation and travel.
Be realistic about weather patterns.
Are you allowing enough time for preparation.
Is it a good time for travel, for any overseas guests? (E.g. Christmas and holidays).
Can the most important people attend?
Drawing a preliminary guest list will enable you to construct a realistic budget.
Your guest numbers will affect the venue you are able to choose.
Divide your list into order of priority.
Remember, a wedding is not like a party when sometimes a third of the guests cannot attend. Your guests are your family and closest friends so will make every effort to attend.
Do not over invite, relying on declines. This is very dangerous as you may end up with extra guests and over budget.
Have a “B” list of people you would like to invite. When you receive a decline you can then send out extra invitations.
It is polite to send an invitation to guests even if you know they cannot attend.
If guests need to travel a “save the date” card is sent out 12-6 months in advance.
Invitations should be sent out 3-4 months in advance
Be realistic about your budget and how much you want to spend on your wedding.
Discuss the budget with any contributors to make sure everyone is happy and have the same expectations.
Establish who the decision maker with the contributors is.
Download the Wellington Wedding Show budget template
Do your homework!
Ask for samples of previous work, images, and references.
If in doubt ask for personal references from previous clients.
Be aware of any contractual agreements. (read the contract)
Keep all receipts
Be clear of how and when they require the final balance (you may need to do this before you go on honeymoon)
Trust your instincts; first impressions are a good test.
-do you like and trust this person
-are they organised and well presented
-time management, where they on time to your appointment.
Are they the actual person you deal with on the day? Do they have other colleges/staff you have to deal with?
Do not over invite, relying on declines. This is very dangerous as you may end up with extra guests and over budget.
Have a “B” list of people you would like to invite. When you receive a decline you can then send out extra invitations.
It is polite to send an invitation to guests even if you know they cannot attend.
If guests need to travel a “save the date” card can be sent out 12-6 months in advance.
Invitations should be sent out 3-4 months in advance.
Invitations set the tone and style of your wedding.
Include as much information as possible in the invitations. The least amount of times you need to do a mailing the better.
Include accommodation information if appropriate.
Include gift information about gifts, registers etc
Include a clear map if the venue is a unique location.
Think about how people RSVP, email or postcards are the safest.
(Phone calls and messages are a little unreliable and take a lot of your time).
Be very clear with all information;
Who
When
Where
RSVP details
It is important you choose the right attendants as they play a crucial part on the day.
They should be the people who are closest to you and who you would want by your side on the day.
You don’t have to have matching numbers of attendants
People love to be included in your wedding. If they are not part of the bridal party and you would like them to feel special, you could;
Include people in preliminary meetings, an extra person is often handy as they are emotionally involved and have a clearer head.
A fun working bee, constructing stationery or favours.
Ushers, seating guests for the ceremony, handing out order of service.
Helping to organise any events leading up to wedding, bridal shower, hens party, buck night, rehearsal dinner.
Readings or poems at the ceremony.
Set up on the day, ensuring things are set up and ready.
Many people have extra parents due to second marriages. It is important for you to do what you feel most comfortable with, without offending anyone.
You can walk down the isle with 2 parents.
If you can’t choose between parents to walk you down the isle it could be a sibling, grandparent, friend, son, daughter, anyone in your family who is important to you.
You don’t have to have your attendants sign the register you could include your parents in this role.
A candle lighting ceremony is also a nice way to include your parents.
Children are a lovely addition to your bridal party and wedding.
Many Bride and Grooms have their own children before they get married, so play a big part in the wedding.
Be realistic in your expectations, depending on the age of the children they may not perform to plan on the day.
Keep the day of the wedding as fun as possible. The children should arrive as closely as possible to the time of the ceremony.
It may be good idea if possible to dress the children on site to ensure everything stays clean.
Make sure you have basic requirements for children, car seat, water, nibbles, wet wipes, quiet activity/toy.
It is unfair to both parents and children to have the children attend the reception. The children are too tired and the parents can’t really enjoy themselves.
Organise a special dinner for the children to be held while the pre dinner drinks are being held. This is a far more relaxed time for children to be mingling with the other guests.
Provide fun goodie bags with their names printed on the front. Fill with colouring books and pencils, cookies, sugar free lollies, wands, crowns, small cars etc.
Offer to organise a nanny or babysitter for out of town guests.
If some guests have new born babies and are breast feeding they may need to bring their wee baby. Check to see if there is a more private area for breast feeding.
So many couples live together before they marry now and have a whole house full of possessions.
Just remember, your guests will want to give you a lovely present so it is not rude to pre-empt the situation. It is far better to receive a gift you like and will use.
Gift registers are the easiest way of selecting items for your home. Remember to select a wide range of price options, as some guests will spend more than others.
If you don’t need any items for your home;
Start a wine cellar, ask guests to bring/buy you their favourite bottle of wine.
Start a library, ask guests to buy you a copy of their favourite book. (or bring you their pre loved version)
Ask you guests to contribute towards a piece of art or sculpture, you could include an image of this in your invitations
Ask your guests to contribute towards your honeymoon
Paula Bevege
Phone 0274 490 025
Charlotte Wood
Phone 027 372 5015
Address
po box 27466,
Marion Square,
Wellington,
New Zealand.